Illinois Mayor Jim Ardis
One of our biggest success stories involves Peoria, IL Mayor Jim Ardis. When he became the victim of a parody Twitter account, we jumped into action. To combat his pain and suffering at the hands of a juvenile satire, we developed a plan of action that ended up costing the taxpayers $250,000. We made society pay for his hurt feelings (literally in this case). Now he doesn't have to suffer alone!
Al-Qaeda's Branch in Yemen
Another major success story was how we helped the Yemenis wing of Al-Qaeda reconcile the pain and suffering leveled upon them by the vicious satirical French magazine Charlie Hebdo. This awful tabloid had hurt their religious sensibilities by printing visual depictions of the prophet Muhammad in blasphemous fashion. These persecuted victims of satire turned to us, and with our guidance and help devised a plan to insure that their emotional trauma was vindicated.
Your Story Here
These are just a few of our success stories and yours could be next! Whether someone jokingly claimed you were dead, or mockingly made light of your past failures - we can help you! No satire is too small. We know the pain is as big as you make it!